I ain't laughing Pete, it's a fair question (or two) 😉
1 Location: you're on the right track👍 A little distribution board, e.g. built on Veroboard, is a good tidy solution and simplifies any troubleshooting later. Put the resistors in the + lead to the LEDs.
2 Resistor size and heat: 1/8 or 1/4 W resistors will do nicely. Since they will only be passing 20 to 30mA they should not get hot. The size is about 3mmx 10mm. Allow 3 or 4mm at each end for the leads for flat mounting.
3 Values: Before we can determine these we will need to know what voltage is supplied to the dropping resistors on the circuit board just before the plug and socket connection to the lamp wire.
So you will have to do some testing with your multi-meter😲
before you pull anything apart make a sketch of the lamps connections to the board. Switch on your TX and RX - IN THAT ORDER PLEASE!
Switch on each existing light in turn and measure the volts at the socket on the board, referred to the negative of the main battery supply.
Then look for one of those teeny SMD resistors directly connected to the socket pin you've just measured and check the volts at both ends while the lamp is on. Note all these readings on your sketch.
Make a clear photo of this sketch and post it or PM me for my email address. doug-bell@t-online.de that might get deleted by the site system🤔 When we have these readings I can work out some suitable combinations to achieve what you want and minimise the number of different resistors. Basically I need to know if the full 7.2V of the main battery is switched to the resistor by the RX output! if not then what!?
Hope this makes sense 😉 Takes longer to describe than to do it !
Re sourcing: Try Radio Shack. I recently pointed another site colleague (figtree) in this direction for a similar project with his Brooklyn tug.
For instance-
https://www.radioshack.com/collections/resistors/products/500-piece-1-4-watt-carbon-film-resistor-assortment?variant=20332255301
This is a collection of so called preferred values, i.e. near enough standard values and cheap to produce by the millions.
For $7.50 it's got all the values you are likely to need for the next 10 years illuminated boating 😁
Cheers, Doug 😎🤓